Momentary Escape.

click to enlarge, I suppose. (:

night unfurls it's splendour.

Eyebrows furrowed, she tried to focus, but her mind was a spool that had become untangled and tangled all at once. Though she had some idea of what these thoughts encompassed, she knew not where they would lead her in this journey. So much had happened within the few months just passed, to an overwhelming extent. She felt she had grown stronger, yet on the inside, fragile. She wasn’t quite certain how to deal with what life had cast her way, though she was fiercely certain she would be able to wade through it, eventually. Only at present, it was increasingly difficult to see beyond what was directly in front of her. And when the spool did unfurl in that direction, only uncertainty ensued...

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Cheers, @Teacuplift. 

----

I don’t care how emo I sound.

I feel really...isolated right now. Like no one knows what I’m going through. Yes, I am aware I have amazing family and friends behind me, but it doesn’t ... I don’t know..quite suffice?

My best friends are all literally out of town. D in the UK, S in China, S in Sydney. And this is becoming more and more apparent. I’m a pretty happy independent person as it is, but I miss them. I miss being able to splurge and divulge and just find comfort in knowing I’m being heard. Especially now. I can’t thank Y and C and C for being here for me especially of late. Even S and E the other day, despite the language barrier, I really felt we got somewhere. Thanks <3.

Today I visited B at the PA, I... I can’t even convey how I feel about what she’s going through. My thoughts and prayers are with her and her family. Dear dear DEAR God, please please please...you KNOW we are all hoping hard that everything will be okay. Thank you for everything.


*Exhale* I really feel like going away. Running. Escaping. If only for a weekend. Just the coast, or back to Sydney, Melbourne..or somewhere I’ve not been before. To be alone with my thoughts. Alone so I can realise. re-evaluate. seek clarity. Is that selfish? Sigh. I don’t even know anymore. SOMEBODY ACCOMPANY ME!!!? :D:D:D

Lotsa love, (which I know is very much reciprocated, so please dismiss this selfish post :P)
-Mizz

"I asked God for strength, and he gave me challenges to overcome..."

Boost.

Yes. Yes it's Justin Bieber. But this song has helped me keep going tonight. And reminded me that things are okay... I just need to trust in Him!

Life<3.

-Mizz.

PS Thank you for my parents, God. (:

out of hibernation.

Dearest Teacups,

Since I've already spammed you twice this morning, I've decided to post my already composed reply here, instead, as I know it will only be soon that you see this (:

Just caught up on your blog. The latest post (right-click,open in new tab) just makes me wonder and appreciate. God certainly speaks in mysterious ways <3. Thanks for awakening. For stirring. This song immediately played in my 'mindpod' (as you would say <3) as my eyes finished reading the last few lines... I can't deny there's a sense of depth.. an awakening.. a..Something in me ready to emerge. I think it's name is Holy Spirit. . . Welcome back (:

Yours,

Mizz

P is for...

Wow, it sure has been a while, hasn't it!?! I suppose my life has been so chocker-block of late I'd not even noticed! :P
That's not to say I've had nothing to blog about, mind you...there's may a mental post I've made.. ahh, apologies apologies (:

Hrmm, well here's something I started tonight, seems blogworthy enough....

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Now playing: Hide and Seek -Imogen Heap

There’s no other way to put it. I am starting to miss you. And I daresay I am even struggling slightly to recall, in this newfound silence, how life was before I met you.




P is for Provisional Licence!

Friday, 5 May marked this epic occasion. I am proud to say, my second attempt at proving myself worthy for Queensland roads was a SUCCESS! With just ONE error!! (Was completely no fault of my own btw, I totes had right of way at this intersection, though driver marker Lisa said she’d mark it down so I would look out for it (: ) But yes, had a lesson right before this and as Mr Vo (of VoVo Driving -message me for his number, he’s super dooper teacher and awesome value), said, ‘Miriam, hope you don’t need to book another test aye, the wait at this test centre is very long...” Massive encouraging. Hahaha, but rightly so as I made pretty much every mistake possible in the hour lesson prior to the test. *Seriousface.* The fact that I passed, let alone with only one MINOR fault astounded and shocked us both! :D In hindsight, and on a positive note, I suppose this meant I got them all out of my system! Come test time, I tried and apparently, succeeded, to get my calm on and ‘in the zone’ mentality (apparently I wasn’t initially concentrating very well). I prayed and prayed. I knew I was ready already!


P is for Perspective

Ever since Dan’s diagnosis, it’s as if nothing matters anymore, as much. Second thoughts are second nature. Like whether something is worth getting upset over anymore. The smaller things become less and less trivial. L I F E  G O E S  O N. And when I do burst, I am left questioning my reaction -was it worth it?

By the same token, the meanings of everything have magnified ten fold. It seems I have become more... attuned to everything around me. I find empathy comes easier, almost naturally to me now. I’m more compassionate. My faith has skyrocketed. I’m so appreciative of just, the littlest things.


P is for Prayer

Definitely something I’m doing more frequently. Just little hello’s to God. Telling him how I’m doing, asking for some feedback, strength, grace and guidance. Everywhere. Anywhere. Anytime. Whenever I’m uncertain or afraid. Or just grateful and happy.


P is for Patience

I’m thinking I’ll need a lot of this to get through what is to come. I’ve never had the experience of watching such a close friend of mine go through cancer, and everything that goes with it. Sure, I’ve had friends of friends -Monica, Jeffwin- and an Uncle -Uncle Joel- but never...never someone I’ve had such a connection with. And now.. I think right now the word is helpless. I sort of feel..helpless. I want to be there for him, there to support him, there to help him through this. But it’s hard to be there for him when he’s not even there...you know? It’s a little bit frightening...It’s like his spark has gone out...but I know it’s just grown dim. Corn and cheesiness aside, I like to think this is true, and that it’ll only come back stronger and brighter, Lance Armstrong style :P. (: (:


P is for Perseverance

/Persistence. Cause that’s what he’s gotta keep doing. It’s what we gotta keep doing. Being. It’s gonna be undoubtedly difficult. Admittedly I’ve no idea what to expect. And I’m starting to realise how brave and a bit naive it was to think this was going to be easy breezy peasy. This is becoming a challenge. And my mind keeps wondering. If I’m finding it hard -me, who’s only come to know him in a few months...then what of those who’ve known him for years? Those who know him inside out. Who’ve been with him through thick and thin. I wonder how they’re coping. I wonder if I have a right to worry. Given I lack an in-depth history with him. Or should I even feel I should be allowed to be there for him, considering this. Everything. Who am I, in this, and where do I stand?

Hmmm, well this is me.
<3. Mizz.

Oh. And some pics.

need haircut! To chop or trim? Also I kinda sorta like how this photo turned out... :P

Bicycle Cake for the BBQ last Sat! NOMMMM. Made by yours truly ;D!